matsumelrose: (pic#8202706)
2015-12-06 07:41 pm

Change

I'm going to have to make some big changes in my life. It will almost completely change the direction I have set out. I have made some pretty bad choices in that past, for which I'm still paying. Now it will have to stop.

I am going to enroll into the THIRD university in my life. If I had sticked to the first one, I would be graduating next June. But I was lazy and unmotivated. I thought I deserved better. I enrolled into NU in JP and thought this would be it, I would be departing to adulthood only two years late, no big deal. But this time, I fucked up the financial plan. I couldn't afford myself and my parent's support was insufficient. I had to go back. I was depressed. I hated my life and everything. I blamed everyone, me, my parents, the school, people who are more well-off than me. Eventually, I got back to my feet. Eventually, I have to move on. I have to figure out a plan. 

Plan A: I stay back, working while trying to get a Diploma degree and hope to graduate and start working by early 2018. Plan B: I get a scholarship to MU, start all over again, and get a college degree by early 2020. Finance-wise, with Plan B, I won't need to ask for my parent's support and can save up a good fund when I finish university. But it will be a little late and I might not be getting the scholarship at all. With Plan A, I still need a little help from my parents but I will can start working earlier so I can pay them back. I will only get a Diploma though, but I'm planning to enroll in a distance undergraduate course, hope to get a degree by late 2019. 

So Plan A will give me more work experience, two not so great degrees, maybe a JLPT N1 on the way and tiny saving account. Plan B will give me a great degree, a tidy sum after I graduate if I'm hard-working, no work experience though. To me, Plan B sounds a lot better than Plan A. The only thing is, Plan B can only happen if they give me that scholarship.

I will know where my life will be going in a month and a half. Now I have to contend with my temporary job, which pays quite well though a little boring but it keeps me from living off my parents entirely and helps me save up money. I'm also grateful for my friends, who show their support to me no matter what. One of whom even got me into a great project because he knows I need to be busy - and I AM. I'm at twenty-one, and next year, most of my friends will be graduating. It's hard to be one hundred percent happy for them without pitying my situation. But I'll try to stay positive - in fact, it will be my only solution for 2016 - stay positive and productive. I have made mistake, paid for it and learned my lesson. Now I just have to go on and live fulfillingly.
matsumelrose: (Default)
2014-07-02 03:27 pm
Entry tags:

[fic] Coming Into Us 1/2

Title: Coming Into Us
Rating: NC-17
Word count: ~12,000
Summary: Jun’s campus job takes him to the restricted section of Keio’s main library, where he finds Sho in a magazine.
Warning: mastubation with porn magazine, sex in public place, hint of one-sided Aiba/Sho
Author’s note: This is for the fic exchange in [livejournal.com profile] sakumoto. Written for [profile] mylittlecthulhu[livejournal.com profile] mylittlecthulhu. I've done some final twitchs here and there so this is gonna a bit different from the com's posts.

In case I didn’t deliver it clearly, in this universe, Sho was born off the rich and had to take over family’s business right after college. Jun’s family owned a farm in Sasebo, Nagasaki and he was currently in Keio. Sho was about four years older than Jun.

To [livejournal.com profile] mylittlecthulhu: I tried to feature as many of your promts as I can and this is what I ended up with. I am not sure this is what you have in mind, and if not, I hope at least you enjoy it.

And I have to pay my token of thanks to the mod for her endless patience and to the beta, who has done a great job straightening my flawed English. Thank you both, so much. ♥

Sho had never said he didn’t mind stripping down for everyone to see )
matsumelrose: (Default)
2011-06-23 07:38 pm

[fic] Fake memories and true loves

Title: Fake memories and true loves
Pairing: Goda Takeshi/Kamiyama Satoru
Rating: PG-13
Warning: Swearings
Word count: 1,625
Disclaimer: ONLY the plot is mine.
Note: This is the first fan fiction I have ever completed. Unbeta-ed. Constructive criticism is welcome. Written for challenge 001 on soba_pair@LJ